Shoulda. Coulda. Woulda.

This blog came to light after I got a sign that I have needed for awhile now. Although it was something I already knew at my core, sometimes we just need that reassurance or simply a reminder of something we already know. Sometimes that reassurance will come gently and subtly, and sometimes it is so clear and loud that we can no longer denying it. I have known for awhile now what my life purpose is, and yet, for many reasons, I have tried and tried to deny it. I came to the realisation that I have been self sabotaging myself by procrastinating.

procrastinate
prə(ʊ)ˈkrastɪneɪt/
verb
  1. delay or postpone action; put off doing something

Why do we procrastinate?

I am a perfectionist. But I also procrastinate. ALOT. When I was at uni, I would be super organised – think penciling in all the key dates in my diary (colour coordinated of course) and work out a week by week plan for getting that assignment done. But more often than not, I would end up starting it the day before it was due. I often would ask myself why I did this – I certainly didn’t get a natural high off the thrill of the would I or wouldn’t I finish it in time…

I never understood why I procrastinated until very recently. And the answer surprised me. I have discovered that in fact, we procrastinate not because of laziness (majority of the time!), but because we are so fearful that the outcome won’t be perfect or that we might fail. As a result, we put off taking action, for a few days or weeks, or even worse – forever. Logically, I can say how crazy that is!!! But this is not the logical mind talking, this is the ego. The ego is responsible for telling us that “we aren’t good enough”, it hones in on our insecurities and it can actually paralyze us. So whilst we know that we should apply for that course, finish writing that book or start our own business, the ego uses its sneaky tricks that lead us to procrastinate. It is very ‘creative’ with coming up with 101 excuses why we shouldn’t. I bet you could list at least 10 excuses you use on a regular basis right now.

Too often we are so scared of failing and we delay doing something on the basis that we might fail. Well darling, let me tell you that you are not only wasting your gifts if you aren’t sharing them, but you aren’t living your life to its full potential. Here’s a revelation – so what if you do fail? And is there even such thing as failure? Perhaps what society terms as failure, is actually the universe closing a door and leading us to another that holds an even greater outcome for us. Don’t be so quick to see your situation in the darkness of the ego because things turn out differently than you expected them to.

Perfectionism is something I have struggled with my whole life. The pressure to be the perfect daughter, granddaughter, friend, student, lover, employee. It is great to have certain standards for yourself to be the best that you can be. But when it inhibits you from being YOU and following your dreams and passions – you have to ask yourself whether or not those pressures that we place on ourselves are actually serving us. These false perceptions of who we think we should be just separate us from love and living in the light.

I want to share with you what has come up for me this week and what has prompted me to share on this topic. I have been procrastinating really embracing a regular yoga practice and pursuing my writing with a fiery passion that comes from jumping in with both feet. These are things that I know will make me feel good and are connected to my life purpose. But also things I haven’t been able to consistently commit to as a result of my perfectionism and fear of failure. But enough is enough. It is time to stop playing small and letting time slip away. It is time for ACTION.

Maybe this blog post isn’t perfect, but I am OK with that. I enjoyed every minute writing it (in fact I didn’t even realise that that I had been sitting at my computer writing for almost two hours!) and I have faith that it will serve those that need it. I feel so energised and inspired (in spirit) that I am asking myself what took me so long!

Yesterday you said tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes. Don’t wake up one day and say I should have done this, I could have done this, or I would have done this (aka a case of the Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda). Just let go of your need to be perfect, let go of your fear of failure and go for it!

 

So beautiful, tell me in the comments below what have you been procrastinating
about 
and how you are going to take action on that aspect in your life NOW?

Choose peace. Choose love. Choose light. 

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