When it comes to standing your ground; be assertive not aggressive. Easier said than done right! In fact, it is often difficult to stand our ground in the first place let alone to do so without the hostility.
Often people think that being a positive and happy person means that they should not stand up for themselves. This is a common misconception and it is actually doing you a great disservice. Not standing your ground is damaging, not only to you but also to your relationships with others. When we are not honest with our feelings, we are not being our authentic true self. In fact we are choosing fear over love in this instance. We are so worried that we will be rejected because we spoke up that instead we choose to act like everything is okay. Fact: people are not mind readers, so while we may think it is very obvious that a person should not have done X or said Y, unless we tell them how we feel they may not even realise the impact of what they have said or done.
It can be very difficult to assert ourselves but it is also an extremely important skill to master. There is however a distinct difference between being aggressive and being assertive. When you assert yourself, you do so from a place of love rather than attack. The difference is in your delivery and this can be the make or break. We don’t have to be disrespectful, insulting or aggressive when we stand our ground. Simply, be honest and express your feelings. It may pay to avoid doing this in the heat of the moment when you are upset or angry, so give yourself some time to cool down before you start that conversation.
When we share with someone how their unkind words made us feel or that their actions were not acceptable, we also open up to an opportunity to grow. It allows us to be ourselves with conviction and the relationship has the opportunity to strengthen. That is not to say that even if you assert yourself in the most loving way that you will get always get a positive reaction, but it does increase the chances. Odds are that you will encounter someone who does not react well but then you might want to consider how much you allow them in your life.
When we allow someone to treat us like crap, we are actually saying to that person that we accept that behaviour. The more chances you give someone to treat you that way, the more they will lose respect for your standards. They will ignore your standards because they know that you will give them another chance and they aren’t afraid to lose you because they know you won’t walk away. Often a situation will keep repeating itself until we learn the lesson. We are all human and we make mistakes (a lot!) but repeated disrespect should not be tolerated.
Give yourself permission to stand your ground.
Choose peace. Choose love. Choose light.