How Fear is Holding You Back

Don’t let fear keep you playing small. Fear is simply False Evidence Appearing Real.

“Fears are nothing more than a state of mind.” —Napoleon Hill

Fear has a sneaky way of tricking us into believing that it is protecting us. And hey when fear says “don’t walk down that dark street alone” we should definitely listen. But 9 times out of 10, I can guarantee you that fear is holding you back from being the person you want to be.

Fear is a form of self-sabotage by our inner mean girl (or boy). It keeps us playing small and it keeps us stuck. Fear can be paralysing and will keep you “safe” by being stuck in the same old patterns. And you’ve probably heard me say before: Nothing changes if nothing changes. The very definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. When we are stuck in the fear cycle we have separated from Love and have forgotten our true nature.

You may be oblivious to your fears because it often disguises itself as protection. “Protecting” you from change, from judgment and from disappointing others – just to name a few. So we start to make decisions from a place of fear which means we are denying our authentic self and in turn dimming our light and depriving the world of seeing who we truly are.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” —Nelson Mandela

From the age of 7 years old I told anyone who would listen that I wanted to be a lawyer. When I finally got to Law School at the age of 21 I was devastated to discover that I absolutely hated it! But I was determined to finish anyway because I was worried about what it meant if I didn’t. I didn’t want to let everyone down and I was scared what it meant that I had change my mind. So I graduated and reached my “dream” of becoming a lawyer. I landed a “dream job” in a fancy law firm but it was far from a dream. I dreaded going to work in the morning and my anxiety went through the roof. I lost my spark and my passion and went into a depressive state of mind. I knew I needed to leave but fear held me back so I continued to push through until the Universe intervened and I was made redundant.

This was my out. My excuse to leave my career as a lawyer. Finally…

But instead of listening to my intuition and my body, I did what I thought I should do: I got another job as a lawyer. Fortunately for me I landed a job with the most amazing group of people who I wouldn’t have got through last year without. But my intuition kept nudging to me that I need to jump, jump all in with my true passions. So when I decided to move from Melbourne to the Gold Coast a few months ago, I kicked fear to the curb and made a HUGE change. I let go of my career as a lawyer and I am now working full time coaching, speaking and writing!

No it wasn’t easy. Yes it was scary. But boy-oh-boy the things that have unfolded since I started following my heart, just WOW! I am now leading Circles with Shae and workshops, guest speaking opportunities have popped up and so much more that I can’t share (just yet!).

Often what scares the shit out of us is exactly what we should be doing. But when we follow our intuition, the Universe has a way of aligning the right people and opportunities at the right time.

“Do the thing we fear, and death of fear is certain.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

Maybe fear has stopped you pursuing a new relationship, a new career or from looking after your body.

Next time fear pops up, try asking your this question: How would I feel if I didn’t do X?

How would it feel not to chase your dream career?

How would it feel not to share your story and help others?

How would it feel not to nourish your body?

I would love for you to share in the comments below how fear is holding you back in your life and ONE thing you can do to start to move beyond that fear.

And a final thought…

“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.” —Helen Keller

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